OLDER POSTS
Formerly "A Fuck You Letter to Hackers, Haters, Spammers, Stalkers & Trolls".
But I chose to go a different route with the post title because my sister who reads my blog frowns furiously when I swear - "swearing is low-class, lazy language". And she advised me to refrain from writing a confrontational entry that would invite more trouble from... fuckwads. (Ooops, what? It's hard to take the high road, OK?) Umm, the original post began like this:
"The veil of anonymity the internet provides us with enables y'all to yap your traps without any fear of repercussions. I'm not discomforted by the unfounded, unproven "truths" of which you speak because I value only the opinions of reasonable people. What discomforts me is that no matter how many times I respond to your dimwitted retorts, there's no way we'll ever come to an understanding... short of me shoving my wide foot up your ass. And this being the internet, I'm unable to do that.
To the trolls who stalked me on my social networking spaces and to the hackers who porked my blog... GET A LIFE. Because my life? Not that interesting. I know.
I don't mind people expressing an opinion. But when people use language that degenerates into racial or ethnic hatred, I'm going to delete the comment. Tough shit! Haters to the left. Sane, smart and sexy people to the right. My right... fucktard.
As for human spammers, even if y'all do take the time to type out your shit, I see your motives and scummy links. I moderate ALL comments. DELETE. And death to bots!"
I started reading 8 months of unread blog e-mail. Vitriol. Pork you, pork me, pork everybody. But vitriol begets vitriol, so I abandoned that path of stress. I choose Zen and serenity now. Ohhhmmm... I want a pork sandwich. Ohhhmmm... or grilled / BBQ pork on pointy skewers?
Yeah, so I differentiate the term "grilling" from "barbecue / barbeque / BBQ / Bar-B-Q". To simplify, grilling is cooking food over a direct or high-heat source for a short time and BBQ is cooked over an indirect or low-heat source for a longer period. I mostly grill these days. Whether you call it shish kebab, kebap, kabab, kebob, kabob, kibob, kebhav, kephav, qabab, brochette, satay or souvlaki, I seem to prefer my grilled / BBQ foods cooked on a stick. Beast on a pointy stick is dangerous, portable food. Very caveman... with spear. Me hungry. Kill.
The first photo above is a plate of my Mom's "Ginger Lime Soy Glazed BBQ Pork, Grilled Onions, Scalloped Potatoes, Salad & Rice".
Click on a thumbnail to view a larger version. More pork nom nom nom:
On the left, a heaping platter of Mom's "Ginger Lime Soy Glazed BBQ Pork" garnished with green onions and lime wedges. On the right, Mom's "Orange Soy Marinated Grilled Pork Skewers & Onions". Recipes? Eh? Garlic, ginger, soy sauce, sugar, citrus... be creative.
When I'm not at home to enjoy my Mom's cooking, I get my pointy sticks fix at my local Greek restaurant. Mmm, "Pork Souvlaki Dinner with Greek Salad, Rice, Pita & Tzatziki". Garlicky.
So, excuse my manners while I eat my supersized serving of Weezer's Pork and Beans.
In the meantime, to all you fuckface spammers, let me introduce you to Les Grossman:
OK, so now that I got that OUT of my system, back to posting pics of fat cats. Whatever. :-P
Au revoir,
Massa aka "fruity oaty bar"
P.S. Waiting for the hate mail from hardcore, militant vegans and vegetarians offended by the pork parade. And to that I say, "May the Tofurkey Force be with you. Peace. And bacon."
Le Petit Déjeuner, Blueberry Oat Pancakes, Eggs, La Petite Mort
Kiss My Farce: French Toast - Pain Perdu - Temps Perdu - Time Lost
Reflections of Cat Power - King Rides By (Manny Pacquiao Video)
Taking a Billie Holiday from Holiday Ham and Turkey Leftovers
I Won't Worry Over Blood, Endings, Greetings & Rosey Beginnings
Must Be Santa Cat... Here Comes Santa Pooper Scooper Bloopers
You Can Get a Little Wink If You Got a Little Pink in Your Swing
To Squash and Stew... Or... To Stop, Drop, Pop and Tootsie Roll
Hello y'all, sorry for the late replies. Anyway, I finally published a new post yesterday. Yay?!
@Alisa: Hypnotic images? Oooh, thanks.
@Rad: Hi! I've missed you online. Hopping by to your Tumblr, soon!
@Scart: LOL, I'm not witty. Just snarky.
@Pedro: Hmm, good guesses. But I am so over Inception. ;-)
@Raymund: Yeah, I love that Greek souvlaki meal.
@Mindanaoan: Oooh, your first comment on my blog. Thanks for the hop.
@Ami: Mmm, kare-kare. Me, become a chef? Chefs stand up. I require a chair. :-P
@Billycoy: Titti... lated. Ewww. Dude, you're sick. J/K.
@Quiteambitious: Hey, you left your first comment on my blog! Thanks.
@Zerovoltage: Ironically, I got spammed a lot after this post. Sigh.
@Marie: OK, more cat posts. I've already earned "Crazy Cat Lady" title.
@Evilgenius: I'll send you an e-mail tomorrow explaining... something. :-)
These images are hypnotic! I want these pork BBQ. Your blog is wonderful.
I know your post has an important message to net losers everywhere but damn, it's making me hungry.
Confrontational post is for witty people only and I do not have that hihihi. It's nice to voice out what we really feel inside. I hope I have the guts!
BTW, love all the food photos. They look more yummy the way you captured them.
Subliminal message, much? "I want a pork sandwich" --> Pork Chop sandwich! --> Fensler Films -->Oh shit, get the f**k out of here! What are you doing? Go, get the f**k out of here, you stupid idiots!
Or maybe it's my imagination.
I choose... serenity now --> nice, layered meaning.
- literally: immediate calmness
- (Serenity) self-reference: to fruity oaty bars
- Seinfeld ==> Serenity now, Insanity later.
Hmmm... Serenity now, Insanity later...
Perhaps a riddle can stop this train ( i.e. Loco-motive) of thought?
You're posting for a blog. A blog that will give you SPAM every day. You know where you hope this blog will take you, but you can't be sure. But it doesn't matter. How can it not matter to you where this blog will take you?
Half-remembered-ly,
Juno Bronson
Wow, barbecue! It looks really delicious, especially the last picture - looks like a lot of things happening together, the flavours, the colours and even the scent (it looks so good I can smell it from here).
Woohoo, welcome backkkkk! What a way to start blogging again. :-P The pictures got me hungry. *tear
All those colors. Compared with my lame lunch of leftover kare-kare. *drools* And I don't even eat pork. Hey, why aren't you a chef again?
Yay for another post. Damn! You're so good with food porn. I am titillated.
Wow, they look so delicious! Now, I'm hungry, I wanna eat them... :-(
Mmm... porky goodness! Definitely better than swearing. But Hackers, Haters, Spammers, Stalkers & Trolls do deserve some amount of cussin' or does it only feed their egos? :-P
OMG U R SO RONG 4 POSTING PITCHRS OF DED AMINALS... Naw, I'm not a militant vegan. Yet. *shrug*
Wow... Who has that much time?! I mean, I have pretty much no life and even I find that to be a whole hell of a lot of work just to bother one person.
Does it ever get on your nerves to have that one really close family member tell you not to swear? My mother does that same exact thing to me.
YESCATSPLSNAO?
Ha! Finally! FOOD! I mean, a blog post! Hmm... when you said you mostly grill these days... that is so I won't bug you about having a BBQ? BBQ! GRILL! FOOD! ;-)
Did you get my e-mails? The box? I should've mailed it to your sister so she could help me to bug you about the BBQ, LOL! Anyway, it's good to see you back! :-)