Yes, I know my “Casper the Friendly Dead Blog Ghost” shtick has dragged on for far too long… It’s high time I put a kibosh on my Blogus Interruptus, but it was inevitable that I’d resurface. I mean, it’s my blogging pattern — I disappear –> a blog reader gets my attention by doing something nice for me –> I return to give a proper, albeit long-winded thank-you. Besides, I was reminded of the therapeutic maxim, “What you resist persists.” Yup…
Jake The Miserable wrote that the phobia of long words is, ironically, called Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia. I posit that the fear of overly long blog entries is Elephantinefruityoatyblogusityphobia. Boo is the voodoo that I do so well. Be very afraid. I’ll readily admit that I scare away plenty of first-time visitors who are dizzied by my big winding entries littered with spelling errors, run-on sentences, and heinous IMglish chatspeak. I have a dog-eared copy of Strunk & White, but it’s collecting dust on a bookshelf. (The Hippo says, “Pass the soap.” The Elephant hollers, “No soap, radio!”)
Alrighty, let’s get down to this business we call show… of thanks. First up, meet Jasmin Toral aka “Archeia” or “Ynlraey” or “Enexodia”. Multiple Alias Girl maintains a deviantArt gallery. Super creative girl. She drew the nifty picture above for me (Saber character from Fate/stay night). It took me months to clue in on the fact that J. T. is the daughter of Janette Toral, a mover and shaker in the Philippine online community.
I’m in WikiPilipinas (aims to be the largest online Philippine encyclopedia) because of Janette’s Top 10 Emerging Influential Blogs of 2007. Uh, shiny.
Spam, hackers, death threats, love letters from gay men (?), 1 guy dreamt of my blog name, readers offering to feed me sweets (?), blog awards, fan mail, and now… shiny fan art. It’s certainly been an… ehrm, interesting one year of blogging. All I need now is offers of cash. Cash is always good. 
“Brevity is the soul of wit.” Yes, but it’s fun 
mindf**king 7 or 69 readers into believing that a verbose blog about nada & narcissism is good reading.
Just teasing. 
Anyway, I still don’t know who nominated me for… Most Kickass Writer of the Year category in Paolo’s recently concluded Pinoy Evil Blog Awards. I made the Evil 6 shortlist poll, placing 2nd with just 7 votes. Odd, 7 really is my Lucky Number! (Note to self: Hi, Lotto Number.) Whoever submitted my name, please ‘fess up so I can give ya good and proper link love in my next entry. As for the 7 poll voters, I know who y’all are (’cause I clicked on “Detailed Results” link)… Thanks Exene and Jemme!
Maybe I should’ve shamelessly plugged myself to get more votes. I put up a link in my previous last post, but I removed it a few hours after I posted it. Sorry Paolo, I just had to give my readers a break from voting for me in popularity contests. Besides, mano-a-mano with Jessica Zafra? I may be a tad cocky, but I’m not delusional. Umm, I write software defect reports, test plans, technical specifications, business-speak, and very bad poetry. According to Wikipedia, Ms. Zafra “… is a fiction writer, columnist, editor, publisher and former television and radio show host. She is known for her sharp and witty writing style.” I’m only a bit familiar with Mike’s Puckering Time and Ms. J. Z.’s blog. If you’re a frequent visitor here, you would know that I regularly stalk the other three guys: Gibbs Cadiz (a newspaper desk editor/writer), Kubi (a self-described struggling writer trying to stay afloat in a sea of apathy), and Kevin (a 2007 Top 10 Emerging Influential Blogs contest winner).
Muchas gracias to Paolo for mentioning me in his entry, “WHAT ARE THE BEST PINOY BLOGS?” He wrote, “You know how sometimes you have to stop and absorb because there’s too much non-gibberish in what they say?” Wait… non-gibberish? But, I was aiming for 100% pure gibberish! 
Got an e-mail from Claudine Baron from Mad Crowd Media. The big spiel:
“We’re fans of your blog, as we’re sure hundreds of others are too… We aim to be the largest network of high-quality online independent publishers in the Philippines. By bringing together a host of publishers like you into a single network, we are in a unique position to impress local advertisers and demand better rates through a single point of contact. We are harnessing the power of other publications to help you sell yours.”
Hundreds? Publisher? Me? Ehrm, I’m NOT an A-list blogger. C+, maybe. I know next to nothing about Web 2.0, SEO, and making money online. Eh?
Well, I never dismiss an opportunity without research. Janette Toral talked about Mad Crowd Media in her column. Sounds legit. Currently, there are 5 people working for Mad Crowd Media: Benito Sj Bergara (Mr. Founder and Managing Director), ZR Zoleta, Lisa Rossiter, Claudine Baron, and (how am I not surprised?) Jessica Zafra (Director of Publishers). Man, she’s prolific…
Anyway, the primary writer of my blog, Max the Fat Cat (Mad Max Media, hahaha!) advised, “Dude, domain renewal, web hosting, bandwidth, kitty litter and my cat food cost $$$. Maybe you should join the dark side.”:shock:
Plus, I’m a sucker for robot logos. (Guessing the font is Century Gothic?)
I haven’t signed the 8-page contract and negotiated rates, but if you see some ads on my site, you know the reason. Click on ‘em, pretty please. Ads or not, I will continue to stream 100% pure gibberish! Guaranteed. 
Adieu, 
Mad Max Media
Clueless? 1985 Mel Gibson flick, Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome.
Ah, how do you do it so well? Connect disparate topics… in an entry all about… YOU?
You really rock. Stop going away!
But Massa P, can Jessica Zafra manage to convince a millionaire businessman into dropping $30,000 for software he doesn’t need?
I know first-hand, the power of your persuasive business-speak!
You’re back!
Lucky 7, huh… 7, 14, 21, 28, 35, 42, 49 should give you a Lotto Super 7 set… If you win, remember to share the winning jackpot with evilgenius.
Ha! What else is gonna happen with your favorite number? 7 kids… 7 boyfriends… 7 Nutella recipes… Yumm. Haha.
Oh geez, I really hate Math. I placed 6 o’s! Oh, wait. Include the o in ‘cong’ to make it 7. Haha!
Have these smileys always been here? People sure are getting creative with their smileys… It’s so hard to decide which ones to use. I remember a time when there was only
or 
to express happiness or laughter. Now there’s 
and 
. My comment sheet feels old. 
I may be too abstract for your gibberish, that’s why I can’t consider it as such… =P
I’d be more interested to read about these letters from GAY MEN.
Love your sly attention to detail. 69 readers. 69, haha.
Yay! Cat robot!
I misspelled the anti-spam word. Yay.
Hahahaha! Nakaka gulat! Kahit on hiatus ako may link ako dito! Thanks sa link love, fruityoaty. ^_^
Hi fruityoaty,
This has got to be the most hilarious post I’ve read on Mad Crowd Media.
Thanks for the support! I’m, er, I don’t know what to say. Blows my mind. I’ve read it three times and I still don’t know what to say.
Benito
Remind me not to read your blog first thing in the morning.
I’m totally confuzzled. To start with I love your blog entries and I relish in the fact that they’re mostly long and full of gibberish. I disagree with you in that it doesn’t take brainwashing to make people believe narcissism is a blog-worthy topic — it is the cornerstone of personal blogging and we expect it of you. 
Personally, I think I think it’s Max that lures us all in.
Multiple Alias Girl as you so aptly put it, is rather good at drawing. Very nice fanart, I can see why it prompted you to blog.
7 is your lucky number? Well mine is 8. It’s the number of infinity. Does that make me sound pretentious?
Ads on fruityoaty? I would brandish a stick and start to smack you over the head for considering committing such a heinous act, but Max has to eat right? As long as they’re not pop ups I’m with you there, make money online if you can. I’d like to see your take on a PPP, I think it would be interesting.
Mentioned AGAIN? You’re spoiling me, fruity! But thanks — yours is the kind of stalking I like.
love letters from gay men? LOL.
Congrats! “7″ really is turning out to be your lucky number.
Very strange. I said more in my comment. What I said was: it’s great to see a post on here again. I missed your beautiful mess. More power to fruity!
“Elephantinefruityoatyblogusityphobia” XDDDDD
Wow, fruity. People seem to like to line up to kiss your butt. Maybe you should start charging an admission fee? XD Kidding, KIDDING! You deserve to be nominated for things, because you’re talented! Mari would get all confused if she tried that hard to make her blog into gibberish.
And you are so nearly an A+ blogger. You have achieved your goal of gibberish! It’s extremely fun to decipher your posts.
ROBOT LOGOS!
Aww, thank you Miss fruityoaty
I like this post. 
Wow, 2nd of the Kickass Writers of the Year.
I love your blog btw, it’s so hilarious.
( Omg! I am overusing smileys. X_X )
Hey, congrats! Told you your blog rocks!
Aye, fear not the long sentences.
Your stream of thought is very, very much lucid… like a fresh and hot cup of lemon grass tea??? 
Hahaha. I can just see the long line of peeps waiting to comment. It’s like lining up at the ticket box waiting to buy a ticket for a top-grossing movie… like umm… Harry Potter (??!) Hehe.
Oh and btw, I tagged the mighty blog-goddess FruityOaty. Really wanted to see what your desktop looks like.
I like this smiley
— kinda dances like me.
You can kick anything and anyone anywhere with your writings, haha.
Keep it up.
Congrats on being influential and stuff like that there…
Breaking my hiatus to comment. (Gawd, I missed a lot of things.
) Love letters from gay men? How intriguing! Must’ve been the thrust of your quasi-phallic wit. 
After trying to read this blog, I still have absolutely no idea what it’s about, but I like the use of images.
I think you’re the Most Kickass Writer!
Hahaha, Jessica Zafra just gets away with it.
@Marni: I couldn’t agree more.
You’re doing so well. You’re one of my favorite bloggers and I’m sure you’re going to be one of those ‘big blogs’ someday because 80% of bloggers I stumble upon can’t go beyond 10 people exposure.
No, I’m Buffy’s biggest fan!
Hahaha, there’s something about that show that even though I’ve seen it numerous times, I still laugh at the funny parts and my eyes still water on the heartbreaking ones. And the puns, how I love the Scoobies’ gibberish talks. 
I’m not surprised why your blog’s so popular in the blogosphere, it’s Ï‹ber fun to read and every post is somewhat different. But I still think the main reason is Max. I gotta get myself an obese cat. Here kitty, kitty.
Go fruity go go!! Your fans need regular updates, fruity!
Kiss
Fendi
It is indeed flattering to be mentioned by top caliber bloggers and be at least nominated with those blog awards.
You deserve to be mentioned, nominated and awarded because those hullabaloos you are saying are what your audiences are asking for.
You have a cool beans blog!!!
The narcissistic views and gibberish that people keep on talking about are the things that made your blog entries fascinating. I think it’s the fun and pleasure of knowing and wanting to say what ordinarily comes out of your mind. And what is really you is coming out. Then later on, finding it terrific and interesting to people who are reading it. I am allured and maybe those who appreciate it are the ones who are most likely to understand your way of thinking, too. Way to go, fruity! Yeah, I love reading your blog, too! Keep it up and good luck on the coming $$$! Hehehe!
Oh, actually gibberish or non-gibberish, whatever it may be, it is sensible and a very good read!
And fruity, your blog is really an intelligent one, 
whatever way you want to try to sound. Thanks, thanks, thanks.
“It’s good to be loved.” - MyBlogLog
Now aside from uhm fanmail and random shenanigans, someone made for you a drawing. Weee!~ How cute.
With this huge amount of audience you have, you are really deserving of all the good lovin’ citations, mentions, and awards. Being the kickass that you are, you should keep it up!
Seven surely is a mystical number for you, neh?
Wow, after all those fanmails, you have that cartoon all for you?? You rock!! Hehe… I wonder who will drop the cash? Hehe. Have a nice day!!! Stay fruity!!
@Tina (angelblush.net): Oh yesiree, someone DROPPED THE CASH. USD $5.00! I’ll write about it in an upcoming entry.
@Rad: Nope, I’m Buffy’s Biggest Fan!
The Fat Cat should get his own star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. 
@Kubi: I switched to these smileys a few months ago. Actually, I dislike overuse of smileys, but I caved in to a friend’s request and put ‘em in my comments form, hehehe.
@Evilgenius: Hehe, definitely.
@Jude: Thanks for the sweet reminder. True.
Nice one, fruityoaty. You really are not just fruity, you’re oaty as well.
Well, here’s hoping you didn’t come back only to disappear again.
Hmm, were you aware that none of your smilies are loading?
But anyway… Yay for fanart! =^_^= You totally deserve some fanart and worship because you’re awesome.
Ah, you should have plugged that poll. We would have supported you the whole way and you would have won because you’re awesome.
Congratulations for being the second Most Kickass Writer of the Year!
Max looks fierce… or maybe just hungry.
I love your little animated kitty icon. Congrats on your new opportunity.
… agree with the Jessica Zafra.
Wow, cartoons, theme song lyrics. I want some for my own blog now!
Well, I live in USA. I’m sure there will be more Filipino-Canadians out there.