fruityoaty.com

Today, my TIFF pal Jude teased, “Dude, wassup with your blog? I’ve been sucked into a voting whore portal! Look, I will even create a fake blog to make myself eligible to vote fruityoaty for Bloggers’ Choice Award… if you seek help for your attention-seeking personality disorder. And update your blog more often!” Then he explained that he had recently read 2 lines in a magazine perfectly describing my blog. A description that he would steal and put in his fake links section of his fake blog. This post is… my reply.

The stolen paraphrased lines? “A strangely arm’s length way of describing life. Everything is like something else, somehow never quite itself.” Dear Jude, I really have no idea what you’re talkin’ about. And if you’re going to go through the trouble of faking a description, you might as well make it as pretentious as possible, n’est-ce pas? My fruity manifold soul prefers the matryoshka or onion layer metaphor. A matryoshka or Russian nested doll is a set of dolls of decreasing sizes placed inside one another. Got it, oui?

After my chat with Jude and The Others, a few thoughts crossed my mind:

• I acquaint myself with quirky, wily folks. I also see dead people.
• I have loyal readers who will resort to elaborate means to support my continued blogging. Truthfully, my interest in blogging has been waning for over a month now… and I’ve been told it shows. Sorry?
• More specifically, a few of those loyal readers will resort to helpin’ me win somethin’ and anythin’ in hopes that Massa P will cease the vote whorin’ lame entries and move on to somethin’ fruitier. Sorry?
• A few of those quirky, wily loyal readers need to get a life… as do I. Actually, a short arm’s length way of experiencing life. (Kidding!)
• In all my link plugging (no Jude, NOT link whoring… I’ve never once asked anyone to do a link exchange), I’ve never properly thanked my readers who are blogless by design or circumstance. In actuality, all these readers comprise the majority of my daily e-mails, blog traffic and/or comments: Brad Pitt, Dead Person, Dessert Queen, Em, Evil Twin, God, Hodges, It’s Me Margaret, Jude, Pedro (and his manifold soul), Paulie, Sash aka “Farm Boy”, Yer Pal, and a low metabolism fat cat named Max. Oh yeah, although Evilgenius has a blog based on her very own coded CMS (showoff, WordPress ain’t good enough for ya?), Evilgenius and the referral hits from her blog comprise 6% of my total blog traffic. If she got hit by a bus, well… damn, there goes my 6%! Don’t die! Of course, a whopping 30% comes from me.
• I like to link plug simply because seeing these kinky words onscreen, “I’m plugging these people” is like vicarious sex through words. Sad.

Oh, where did I get the photos of the matryoshka? Last night, my big sis was doing a thorough, physical Spring Cleaning of her bedroom and stuff, which she likened to a good psychological and spiritual Spring Cleaning. Big sis (and only sibling) aka “Dessert Queen” (provider and supporter of most things good and fruity in my life) said that “holding on to so much junk” is like not being able to let go of the past, grasping on to old glory days and not making room for new memories, new stuff and a new chapter in her life. No, I won’t explain the details of what she really meant as it is very personal. The event consisted of her muttering over and over, “Do I really need this?” I’d reply, “Is it a sentimental keeper or just semicrazymental?” Semicrazymental = Garbage Bin or Garage Sale. Naturally, another person’s garbage is another person’s treasure. Massa P scored two shiny, almost new handbags and some other stuff. Thank you. And yes, we can all use a good, thorough Spring Cleaning in our lives. Don’t procastinate.

In crafting my reply to Jude, I spied with my 100 evil eyes… that colourful matryoshka. My sister then explained that it is not a Russian nested doll, but a Polish one she received from her friend who visited Poland. And yes, the 3-inch wooden matryoshka… went into the sentimental bin. Well, Jude, I didn’t have a Pandora’s Box conveniently lying around, hmm? Muahaha!

Oh yeah… if you have a blog, feel free to click on the button below to vote fruityoaty to win the Bloggers’ Choice Award for 2007! It will do wonders for my megalomaniacal fruity quotient. A little hubris is good.

You may vote only once and you must be a blogger to vote. The winner will be announced on March 31, 2007 (Manila time).

Adieu,

fruityoshka

P.S. Yeah, whatever. I couldn’t find a photo of a 2-inch puddle of shallow water. Kisses. Still reading? Why? Didn’t I tell ya to go vote now?

Oh yeah, I’m also going to take a train ride to the “Land of Returning Comments” right now. Sorry… I’ve fallen behind. Busy.